do you have enough 'me-time'?

Most women spend more time looking after the people around them than taking care of themselves.  That's not philosophy, it's just a fact.  It is built into us somewhere, we're genetically programmed to  tend.  That doesn't mean that men don't do their share too, but it does look like it's easier for them to detach themselves and .... go for a run, or watch a match or sit down and read the paper ....

I have noticed that French women really understand the importance of a little me-time.   It is part of the culture that they will find the space in their busy  timetable to take care of themselves too.  Their me-time is often spent doing some sport; having lunch with a girlfriend; or an appointment at their salon de beauté.

So today, on a breather between guests and appointments, I checked into our tiny local beauty salon and got a simple manicure.  Forty minutes of soft music, plump pillows covered with fluffy soft towels, easy conversation, the lovely smells of the perfumes and creams all around me.  No gel, no false nails, no fancy colours, just a quick tidy up and clear nail varnish, but I emerged feeling very good indeed.  I have even resolved to do this sort of things more often!

What do you like to do for a quick pick-me-up?

a very special French lady

I met the elderly gentleman at a brocante fair, he was selling hand made fishing flies.  Works of beauty, exquisite knots of thread and feather and beads, designed to lure and to deceive.  But it wasn't the boxes of flies that drew me in, it was the old piece of fabric thrown across a trestle table and used to create his stall.  A length of pale grey ticking, a most unusual colour, beautiful.

I so wanted that fabric.  My eyes swept along the table, piled high with dozens of boxes, and also crockery and glass ware, the sort of strange mix you only see at these country brocante fairs.

He came up to me, wanting to know what had caught my eye.  " Bonjour mademoiselle".   I smiled.  We chatted about fly fishing, about his dying craft, about how cold it was for selling outdoors, until finally I broke it to him: "Actually, it's your old piece of fabric I'd like to buy".  A raised eyebrow, discreet cough, shrug of Gallic shoulders and a quick pursing of moustached lips as he tried to put a price to the unexpected trophy.

He bought himself some time:  "I have to ask ma femme", and wandered a few steps away, talking into his mobile phone.  He came back looking concerned.  "I'm so sorry...., but my wife doesn't really want to sell that .... it's very useful to her.... she has more at home ... they aren't in very good condition ....  come back this evening when I pack up .... or you could call ... here's my telephone number ... then that's settled, we'll see you tomorrow...."  !!

I left the fair pleased with a few other purchases, but in a total muddle about the fabric.  Did they want to sell at all?    The next day we spoke on the phone and after a few very searching questions, the rather intimidating lady gave me her address and I jumped in the car and headed off across the valley.

As I drove to their small village, I had no idea whether the trip would be worthwhile.  She had insisted on the phone that she didn't want to sell, but at the same time, for a non-seller, she gave me a load of appetite- whetting information.

I finally found their tiny house, very modest, with a happy dog in the small scruffy but flower filled garden.  A lady came out to greet me.  Beautiful.   Walking tall, her elegance strangely out of place in such a modest setting.

She must have been about 75 years old.  Smooth pale skin, well cut grey hair and clear blue eyes that looked right through me.

The piece of grey ticking I had seen at the fair was draped over a garden chair - even better than I had remembered it -  on the table was another piece of red and beige striped ticking, my heart missed a beat.

When you handle old textiles as much as I do, you can recognise a special find just by it's fold.  Linen folds in a soft, supple, heavy manner, like no other fabric.  Pure linen ticking is very unusual today, it hasn't been made since the late 1800's.

But we weren't going to talk about the ticking straight away.  First there were questions.  She wanted to test my credentials:  did I know anything about fabrics?  did I know how to care for old textiles?  how did I iron my sheets (I kid you not!) ? where was I from?  "Ah England .... (she broke into perfect English)... I used to have some very good friends in Kent" she said.

After the  ten minute interrogation I was finally allowed to touch the ticking. "So, as I told you, I can't possibly sell these, they are so useful to me, and they are part of my past life, before I came here ....( her arm lifted and swept around to show the little house and garden)  and they aren't even in good condition any more,  look ..."  She showed me the tiny holes at one end of the grey ticking and several tears in the other piece.

Yet, despite, all her words about wanting to keep them, I was sure she wanted to sell.  For the first time she let me talk:  I smiled,  "Your fabrics are stunning, I have quite a collection at home, but I haven't often seen any this beautiful"

She looked me in the eye and named her price.  I agreed without hesitation and she suggested I step inside to see 'the rest'.

The tiny house was more than cramped.  It looked as if the contents of a large château had been fitted into a garden shed.    "Excusez-moi" she fussed, I know I have kept too much, but when I had to leave my last home for unfortunate reasons, I couldn't leave it all behind.

And then it really started.  From cupboards and from behind doors came a steady flow of monogrammed  porcelain, of crystal, of fine linen and shining silver.   In between each new box that was opened she told me more about her family, her former splendour and her misfortune.

I didn't take any photos while I was there and I can't tell you everything she shared with me; that would be disrespectful to the confidence she showed me.  But I can say that I was fortunate to meet this woman.  She grew up in the lap of luxury, she married well, she was widowed, and through a tragic turn of events she lost everything.

 Today she has created a new life with a charming gentleman who makes fishing flies.  They live simply but they are happy, and she still insists on only using linen bedsheets and silver cutlery.  Now and again she meets someone like myself, and takes pleasure in getting out the treasures she has kept, in remembering easier times, and in a quality and handwork that has now disappeared for ever.

"And the ticking?" I hear you say.  Well yes, I did come away with both pieces of ticking and also with a couple of paintings she didn't have the space for.  I am thrilled to bits with my afternoon and with the treasure.  I hope you have liked hearing about it all.

photos: 1- print from a painting by Fabrice Alberti, available here
2-4 thanks to Google images, photo 5 & 6 me

french ladies who lunch AND my new favourite recipe

I'm not really a regular luncher because my days are pretty full, but now and again it's good to take a break with a couple of girlfriends.

That was the case yesterday.  Eight amies braved the icy roads to get here.  At -7° outside it wasn't the day to arrive in high heels but they still all looked lovely and were pleased to sit down in front of a roaring fire.

 This lovely white azalea was gifted in a basket, perfect.

I served them my new favourite dessert and thought you may like to try the recipe too.  I have made this twice this week but each time it disappears so fast that I still don't have a decent picture -  sorry!  you'll have to imagine it in your plate  :) 

 We call this our Fruit Crumble Cake, as with all my recipes it is really easy to make.  Good home cooking.

To make the cake you will need a deep 8" cake tin (not loose-bottomed) greaseproof/waxed paper, the oven preheated at 190°.

Ingredients are super simple

125gr  (2/3 cup) ground almonds

125 gr (2/3 cup) sugar

250 gr ( 1 good cup) very cold butter 

250gr (2 cups) plain flour

pinch of salt

3 apples peeled, cored and diced

cup of fresh/frozen raspberries or blackberries or blueberries

juice of a lemon

good sprinkling of sugar to taste

First of all, in a mixer blend together the cold butter and all other dry ingredients.  This must stay crumbly in texture not merge into a firm dough.  Very important!

Put the diced apple in a bowl  along with the lemon juice, sugar and red fruit of your choice.  I have tried blackberries, raspberries and blueberries - all delicious.  Toss them around in the bowl until well coated in lemon juice and sugar.

 Line the cake tin with two criss-cross , wide strips of waxed paper, these are vital for lifting the cake from the tin, so leave them long enough to hang over each side.

 Sprinkle half the mixture into the tin.  Do not push down or smooth, you want the mixture to stay as high and airy as possible.    Now simply tip the fruit in, then cover with the remaining crumble mix.  Again do not attempt to push down or smooth: it will work itself out while cooking.

I stand the cake tin on a tray and bake in a hot oven for about 50 minutes.   Ideally the cake should come out of the oven about 15 minutes before eating.  Let it stand a while then carefully lift out of the tin and onto a serving platter (4 hands needed here!), slide the paper strips out from beneath the cake,  carry to the table and bask happily in the limitless admiration of your diners.

We like to serve this with crème anglaise, but vanilla ice cream would be good too.

bon appetit et bon weekend!

French women preparing for spring

Even though we haven't reached the end of January, there is a deliciously spring like feel to the air.  The birds have picked up on it and have dusted off their spring songs.  Snowdrops are out in the garden and like every other woman in France I am beginning to think about Spring... and lighter weight clothes... and putting away those heavy jumpers that have so conveniently hidden the fact that in the winter we indulge in a little over eating. 

UGH!  Some things just have to be said!

So here we go, my insider view on how French women are preparing for the fast approaching spring.

First of all they are moving!  Running, cycling, swimming, dancing, riding, walking or going to the gym - it's not what they do but how often.   The experts say that 20 minutes a day of movement and exercise is enough to make a real difference.  Walking the dog, cycling to the store, taking the stairs instead of a lift, in my case walking up the hill to feed the horses ...it all counts , especially for us bloggers who have too many temptations to stay sitting down!

Next they are drinking water , aqua, de l’eau!  Lots of it, for a couple of weeks they  forget about wine, champagne etc and drink a couple more glasses of water a day than they would normally.    The winter holidays always brings too many opportunities to raise a glass of champagne or indulge in heavy meals, now is the time to repent!

Then of course their food,  SIGH .... French women and their food, it is fascinating to see them surrounded by so many great things to eat and still stay slim.  It's no secret , they hold back!  They are reasonable, a little of everything, moderation, and avoid the carbs and the desserts!  Three well balanced meals a day, no snacking, plenty of vegetables and light protein.  I see it everyday, French women take their time over meals, they don't skip meals, but that doesn't mean they eat a lot. 

One secret I can reveal to you is 'bouillon', light stock, preferably home made not from a cube.  To be drunk with a few vegetables and even a little pasta.  Delicious, satisfying, wholesome.  Effective!

So what do you think?  I know this stuff, you know this stuff, we read it every time we open a magazine, but for the French it is simply non-negotiable.

You want to be slim, you work at it.  So here is my challenge to you, and to me:  let February, March and April be the months that make the difference.  Let us feel good ... à la francaise.

Feel inspired

feel French

feel the difference!

PS.  sorry about the 'slogans' at the end, I've been watching Mad Men!  :)

what makes a girl a real parisienne?

If I say 'parisienne' (which incidentally means a  woman from Paris as opposed to 'parisien' which means a  man), what image does it conjure up in your mind?

Eiffel tower, baguette, French music, perfect hair? ....

As hard as it may be to generalise, there are some stereotypes that work.  As if the women in paris become the archetypes of la femme française.  We live in the country, although only an hour from Paris, and it's always easy to spot a parisienne in a dinner here.

Physically the real Parisienne is neat, well dressed and beautifully presented.   She likes to stay very slim, and is very careful with her diet. (no surprises there!)

She enjoys Paris, can't imagine life possible outside of the city!  She likes to snob the country dwellers but is actually delighted to be invited out of the city at the weekend.

She wears a minimum of make up, often choosing to emphasise either eyes or lips, rather than both.  Her hair isn't always perfectly blow dried, often simply caught up in a soft unruly chignon à la Bardot.

She likes to dress well, but that doesn't always mean designer labels.  The Parisienne will often mix one really good piece, be it a LBD, a great bag or wonderful shoes, with other more ordinary items from her wardrobe.

She works hard and runs around Paris all day long.  She knows the Metro off by heart and is happy to jump on a velib to gain time and get some extra exercise.  If she has children,  she must find a jeune fille to pick them up from school and help them with homework until maman gets back.

She shops at small stores in her quartier, and in the Parisian street markets for her food.  For her clothes she'll have a couple of favourite addresses.

If she's really sporty she'll take part in the race that carries her name 'La Parisienne' a half marathon run every May in Paris.

She loves to meet with a girlfriend for lunch, sitting out on terrace, chatting over a salad and espresso coffee.... and some things just never change!

photos 1 and 4 from La parisienne by ines de la fressange; other photos google

advice to Daphne - staying slim in France

My imaginary friend Daphne has been writing to me again, needing more advice about fitting in here.  Since she arrived in France at the beginning of the year I've been helping her out with dinner etiquette, language problems and other technical points, today she has a problem that's more .... well let's just say that's getting bigger!

My darling Daphne

How lovely to hear from you again ma chérie, I was beginning to think that you'd forgotten all about me; that I was too provincial for you in my country home while you're in your chic Versailles apartment.

No surprise though, to hear what's troubling you this time!  Your petites rondeurs, tes kilos en trop, tes poignées d'amour - yup, you've been hitting the french cuisine since you got here last spring  and it's all gone to your hips.  Très classique!!

What you need is to start acting like a French girl - surely you've noticed how runner-bean thin they all are in Versailles.

There is no easy way around this ma chérie, you've got to change some basic habits:

The little boulangerie at the end of your street may make fantastic macarons, great croissant and amazing home made chocolates, but for a while the only way you should enjoy them is with your eyes!  You heard me ....  I know you see French women buying them, but that doesn't mean they'll eat them.  They gift macarons and chocolates at dinner parties, they buy croissant and pain au chocolat for their children's 4 pm snack and fancy cakes for a family gathering but they don't touch a crumb!

Even the delicious baguette will only be eaten in small bites, la française is unlikely to eat a whole portion of bread with her meal.

Wine - yes, I know it's wonderful stuff, it's sociable to drink and I know that your husband has an impressive wine cellar, but if you keep an eye on your French girlfriends they drink little.  Even at a chic dinner where there is different wine served with each course. It's all about moderation.

However, this doesn't meant you should cut down on the lunches with girlfriends:  très important to be in on the news, to be seen out and about.  Just do as they do: eat salad and fish; drink sparkling water ; no dessert and a couple of strong coffees.  The beauty of this is that you'll sit down and take your time, you'll eat slowly because you'll be chatting, and all that with very few calories.

Now,  I hope Daphne that you're not using your car each day.  You're in town, you need to walk or to use those wonderful bikes you can rent by the hour all over Paris.  

Finally, I'll leave you with a word of advice I heard a French girlfriend pass on recently to another friend who was complaining that she had put on one whole kilo!  "You need a poor, young lover" she said, dead serious.  The girl just nodded in agreement, the logic of her friend's advice obviously crystal clear.   "Poor and young?" I asked, "why's that so important?"  they smiled at me  indulgently, "well," the first replied, "if he's poor he'll be living in some 6th floor garret without a lift, and if he's young then you'll be motivated to get up there to join him ...you know,  ... double the exercise!!"   

Food for thought, darling you have to admit!

Let's meet up soon and have a long chat over a  .... mineral water,

your friend

S

my stylish french girlfriends - Christelle

A while ago I promised you a series of posts about some of the stylish girls I know here.  

I wasn't picky, I just wanted my candidates to be totally gorgeous, talented, creative, to live in a beautiful setting, to have a great job and to be willing to be interviewed and photographed by yours truly.  Surely not too much to ask!  Amazingly I found that I have friends who tick ALL the boxes - lucky, lucky me!!

I'm starting with Christelle.  Anyone who has visited me here will surely remember stopping at Christelle's beautiful little brocante shop.  It took some persuading for her to talk about herself but graciously she accepted, so here we go, a little Q and A, peppered with pictures taken in her home and in her delicious store:

Hi Christelle, thank you for accepting to kick off this French girlfriend series, first of all can you tell us how do you like to dress?

C:  - Merci de m'avoir invitée!  I'm a bit shy about talking about me, but I'll try!  I generally wear neutral, natural colours, often linen.  Clothes that fit in with my active days, my favourite shoes are simple white Converse, I wear them into the ground!

Your style comes across as very natural, rather like your interior design, do you sometimes dress up or wear a lot of make-up?

  C:   I hardly every wear any jewellery, unless it's very discreet, and I really don't use much make-up, sometimes a little mascara.

Your work looks such fun, and you do it so well and so passionately, but you have a young family, do you find it easy to be a maman and to run your business?

C:   I know how lucky I am to be working from my home,  and I try to be sure that the children make the most of me when they get back from school, even though sometimes it's difficult to shut the door to the boutique or to my workshop.   My 'me-time' in the week is early Sunday morning, when the family is still asleep, and I go to look for brocante treasures on the local fairs.

Would you like to live in town, or do you think your place is in the country?

C:  Oh non!!  I could never live in town, I love our home, I love being up early in the morning and enjoying a cup of coffee in my garden before anyone else is awake.  We have good friends in our little village, we love village life.  I wouldn't trade places for anything.

Do you think you could have opened your brocante shop, out here in the country, without your blog,    Bord de Scène?

C:  When I created my blog I met some lovely people, who have become good friends.  It was them who encouraged me to open my shop.  After that I began to realise how popular decoration blogs are, I'm sure that without the blog I could never have opened a store in such a small and remote village.

What happens about meals in your home?  Do you like to cook, do you spend a long time in your kitchen? 

C:    Ah! j'adore la cuisine!  I love to cook for my family, but I don't often follow a recipe.  I love to create in the kitchen, open the fridge door and put together a meal with whatever I find.  I cook with fresh ingredients, we buy our eggs from a neighbour, our vegetables from the village farmer ....  I often prepare dishes that bubble away for a while, like my grandmother used to do.  My sweet speciality is meringue, my friends love them     [yup, I can vouch for that!!]

I asked Christelle if she thought she is a real "femme française", she just laughed and said she couldn't possibly reply, the same answer came when I tried to discover how she stays so slim and lovely looking.

  Charming and modest ... maybe that's what it's all about, being truly French ....

I hope you enjoyed this mini-interview, if you come to visit me here one day, I promise I'll take you to Christelle's brocante and let you enjoy meeting her and seeing her store first hand!   In the meantime if you want to buy from her directly keep an eye on things here.    If you want to see more of Christelle's beautiful home you can see pictures here, or alternatively buy this book that features her salon on the cover and more inside!

Next week - a new French girlfriend tells all!

Repetto - shoes for Frenchwomen

If there is a shoe that represents French women for me, it has to be the Repetto ballerine.  Forget the heels, forget the logos, you can even  forget Louboutin, Repetto wins hands down every time.  Comfortable, pretty, available in every possible colour.  They seem to suit everyone and every occasion.

First created as a real ballet shoe in 1947 by a certain Madame Rose Repetto, the company has grown in leaps and bounds.  Today they do more than just the ballerina flats, but they are legendary for their quality and their chic, and famous for their gorgeous boxes.

I have pair upon pair of ballerina flats - not all Repettos ! - some perfectly simple, and some more dressed up.  Put me on a desert island with a pair of Repettos and a pair of good riding boots and I'd survive and keep my sanity!  How about you, what's your live-in shoe?